Why Guitar Players Have Better Love Lives
Ever since the heyday of rock music, when throngs on eager nubile young groupies swarmed guitarists like Frank Zappa, Eric Clapton and Jimi Hendrix, most folks have assumed that the only reason young men learn to play the guitar, is to score with women. This is true, but only because the only reason men do anything, besides drink and fart, is to score with women.
Is that Robert Fripp on the right?
From the quarterback on the high-school football team, to the class clown, to the most studious bookworm to the biggest burnout, the only reason a guy exerts any effort at anything, is to impress women, starting with his mother. Unfortunately, most of the things that guys do to impress women, completely fail to do so.
How often have you heard women complain about the stupid things men do, that they hate, and all the things they wish men would do, but they don’t? What causes this disconnect between the stupid things men do to impress women, and the stupid things women want men to do?
A large part of this problem stems from the fact that men, especially young men, do not understand how women think. Men cannot fathom why women dress the way they do, why they concern themselves with their appearance, why they like colors, why they think a movie needs more than boobs and explosions to be good, and why they would hesitate, for even a second, at any opportunity to have consensual sex. Men cannot comprehend any of this.
Further, men don’t want to comprehend any of this. Its not that we don’t care, we are actively, fingers stuffed in our ears, la, la, la, la, Not Listening. We don’t want to understand why women worry about their appearance because we don’t want to worry about our appearance. We like black. We like boobs, and we like explosions.
Most of all, we don’t ever want to pause and reflect on whether sex is a good idea under any circumstance. We want to find new ways to overcome women’s objections to sex under any circumstance. Men know that women are smarter. Men also know that men are stronger. Men think that the extra knowledge that women have, makes women weak, and gives men an edge. So, men do not want to know what women think, or how women think. The idea that women think at all still frightens us.
So, how do men decide what they will do to impress the women around them? They certainly will not ask the women around them. No, instead they will look within themselves. A man looks at what impresses him; professional athletes, Green Berets, NASCAR Drivers, Hollywood stunt men, comedians, and the guy who plays lead guitar in his favorite band.
Men seek to impress the women around them by emulating the people that impress them Men play sports, or engage in other silly behavior like driving too fast, doing skateboard tricks, telling stupid jokes, joining the Marines, or learning to play the guitar. Men exert tremendous time, money and energy, learn to discipline themselves, and risk injury or death in these activities, to impress women who, by and large, don’t care about sports, NASCAR, war, action movies, or heavy metal music.
A few men have an exceptional natural talent in these areas, and among them a few even manage to make a career for themselves, simply with their flawless execution of these otherwise stupid, fruitless, and dangerous activities. The rest of us, even though we completely fail to to achieve our own goals, come out of the experience shaken, wounded, and broke, but more or less satisfied that we’ve given it our best shot.
Whether it was the one season you won the pennant, that 1st tour in Afghanistan, or the night your band rocked the house, these events define us, shape our lives, and make us who we are. What finally succeeds in making us attractive to women, is that we are satisfied with ourselves, even when we fail.
Women are never satisfied with themselves. They envy our self-satisfaction, and like being around someone who isn’t always worried about how they look, or what people say about them. Ultimately that’s why women love us.
However, some of the stupid things we do to impress women in our youth, don’t leave us in very good shape for building relationships with the women who actually love us. For instance; many servicemen returning from combat find it very difficult to readjust to civilian life. War injuries, combat related stress, and military experience in general can have a deleterious effect on a man’s ability to enjoy, and fully participate in a relationship.
Sports fosters competitiveness. Competitiveness does not necessarily help in a relationship, either.
Guitar players, on the other hand, develop strong, sensitive fingers. A guitar player knows how to listen. A guitar player can work with others without competing. A guitar player can tell when a relationship is working, and when it isn’t, and a guitar player knows how to express emotion.
For these reasons, of all of the stupid things that men do to impress women, learning to play the guitar turns out to be very effective in the long run.