Well Tomorrow is Election Day. Win or lose, this will be the last time I write about Measure Z. Believe me, I’m as sick of it as you are. I cannot think of a single topic more boring than tax policy, or an activity more pointless than voting, but this blog remains the highest ranked Vote No on Measure Z page on the internet, so I have a job to do.
We’ve dropped a few places since I first reported this phenomena, but lygsbtd remains the only Vote No On Measure Z web site to show up on the first page of search results. However, if you do a google image search, you’ll discover that my Vote No on Measure Z memes dominate the image search results, with seven of the top ten images sourcing from this blog. In the image war, I am kicking their ass!
Unfortunately, this battle won’t be decided by a google image search. This battle will be won at the ballot box, so here I go again, trying to find an entertaining way to motivate you to go to the polls and VOTE NO ON MEASURE Z.
I don’t like telling you to vote. Usually I tell people that voting is for suckers, because voting is for suckers. It takes a special kind of stupidity to believe in democracy. Think about it. How many years did you stay up all night on Christmas Eve, before you realized that Santa Claus was a fraud? Now ask yourself: How long has it been since you’ve seen democracy actually solve a problem or prevent an expensive, pointless war? We have a word for that kind of stupidity. We call that kind of stupidity: “religion.”
Democracy is just the latest fraud religion. Like all fraud religions, it was concocted as a means of extracting money from your pocket, and putting it in someone else’. That’s exactly what Measure Z is all about. Humboldt’s greediest bloodsuckers are counting on Humboldt’s dumbest morons to help them pry more money out of your pocket.
They know that ALL of the greedy bloodsuckers in Humboldt County will vote for their regressive tax measure, because greedy bloodsuckers love to take advantage of people. Even the Libertarians around here (I’m looking at you Fred) can’t say NO to screwing poor people. So, they’ve got the bloodsucker vote wrapped up.
The big problem will be liberals and progressives. Liberals and progressives are the snake handlers and castration cults of the fraud religion known as democracy. They are the dumbest of the dumb. At least the bloodsuckers know that democracy is a game, and they play to win. Liberals and progressives think that democracy has magical powers to solve intractable social and environmental problems, something it has never, ever, done.
Liberals and progressives worship democracy and believe it has supernatural powers. They believe that if the government has more money, its magical powers to solve problems grow stronger. That’s why liberals and progressives like paying taxes. They like to think about all the cool things that government would do if it had more power. Like:
Solve global climate change with electric cars and solar powered bullet trains.
Find a cure for cancer, Ebola, muscular dystrophy and Parkinson’s disease.
End poverty and homelessness.
I’ve got news for you. Government is never going to do any of that stuff. In reality, democracy empowers bloodsuckers to rape the Earth, pollute the environment and take advantage of people, and democracy prevents the rest of us from interfering with it. That’s what democracy does now, and that’s what democracy has always done, but liberals and progressives look back at democracy’s almost 250 year history in the US, and they say, “It still looks good on paper. It really should work this time.”
No, it won’t work, not this time, not next time, not ever. Democracy will never work. Jesus is not coming back, and Santa Claus does not exist. I’m sorry to disappoint you, if I’m the one to break it to you, but professional wrestling is phony too. These are just the facts of life.
Still, these three great frauds, democracy, Christianity and consumerism continue to define our culture, and sometimes it’s just easier to just say “Merry Christmas” than to yell, “Santa is dead!” When someone says “bless you” after you sneeze, it’s not always helpful to say “Fuck you! Your religion is a fraud and you are an idiot!” By the same token, you can hold your nose, go to your polling place, and cast your ballot to stop this whole evil system from stealing even more of your life, even though you know the system is a complete fraud.
Go ahead. Get it over with. Vote NO on Measure Z.
As this campaign season moves into its final frightening week, I feel the curse of Measure Z looming around me. I resent that I must unmask this this diabolical ripoff scheme yet again. For Halloween 2014, I offer this terrifying tale:
No one really knows the depths of the evil that resides in Humboldt County, but the existence of a very well funded, and deeply entrenched community of vampires cannot be disputed. Vampires love Humboldt County because we get lots of fog. Vampires love fog. You can build a castle in the middle of nowhere (like, where else would a vampire live?), and people in town don’t ask too many questions. Vampires like to keep a low profile. The remote location, underground economy, and corrupt constabulary provide plenty of cover for these soulless bloodsuckers.
No one around here bats an eyelash when a hapless young wayfarer disappears into the forest never to be seen alive again. We’re used to it. Kids come. kids go…missing. What happened? Who knows? That’s life in Humboldt County. Sometimes, the kids have families that care. They hire private investigators, because you sure can’t trust the Humboldt County Sheriff’s Dept to investigate a murder, but that usually doesn’t help either. These hills keep their secrets.
More often, kids disappear and no one comes looking for them, because no one cares about them. That’s why they came to Humboldt County in the first place. They had no prospects, and no place to go, so they came here. Someone lured them out to the middle of nowhere with the promise of a shitty illegal job, and then took their life. It happens all the time, but that’s nothing compared to the evil of Measure Z. Today, Humboldt County’s most ravenous vampires plan to suck all of us dry, and they plan to use Measure Z to do it.
The vampires in Humboldt County comprise a small portion of the electorate, but they contribute the lions share of campaign contributions, and today, they hold a majority of the seats on the Humboldt County Board of Supervisors. You’ll notice that they keep the lights quite low in the Supervisors Chambers, and you will find no mirrors anywhere inside.
The leading order of vampires in Humboldt County goes by the name of Hum CPR. Vampires often use CPR to extract the last few drops of blood from their victims, and that’s exactly what they plan to do to us, with Measure Z. They’ve already mined all of the gold, fallen all of the trees and exploited marijuana prohibition to the hilt. Now they want your blood.
Do not fall prey to the vampire’s seductions. Vampires lie. You cannot trust them. What do they tell you about Measure Z? They tell you that the Sheriff takes two or three hours to respond to a 911 call because the Sheriff doesn’t have enough money. What a load of bullshit! It takes the Sheriff two or three hours to respond to a 911 call because:
A. The Sheriff doesn’t give a fuck about your 911 call. He’s too busy looking at google Earth and trying to figure out which giant industrial grow scene will net the most booty, and which ones to avoid because he’s personally invested in them.
B. The Garberville-Redway Chamber of Commerce has already made 30 calls to the Sheriff today, about the same six people eating lunch and talking on the sidewalk in Garberville, and all of those calls will get answered ahead of your emergency.
C. Sheriff Mike Downey is an idiot! Just because we pay the guy a quarter-of-a-million dollars a year, doesn’t mean he’s not the same dumb redneck who thought it’d be fun to swab pepper spray in kids’ eyes, sein’ as how they was chained-up an’ all. The guy doesn’t know how to handle the resources he’s got. Giving him more money won’t solve anything. The guy is doing a shitty job as Sheriff, because he’s as dumb as a box of rocks. Sending more money his way will only allow him to fail even more spectacularly, and expensively.
Think about it. What if I told you that if all of my readers pitched in a hundred bucks each, it would turn me into Leo fucking Tolstoy? Would you believe me? Of course not. Each of you should give me a hundred dollars, because you enjoy my writing, as it is, and you want it to continue. I mean really, if you don’t like my work enough to support it, then what the fuck are you doing here but freeloading.
On the other hand, you should not give money to Sheriff Mike Downey, because he sucks, and giving him more money won’t make him any better at his job. Sheriff Mike Downey should be replaced, not rewarded. Mike Downey is a grunt. He has no taste. He has no sense, and he has no idea how to spend money.
You want to know I know so much about Sheriff Mike Downey? I’ll tell you:
One year, Mike Downey’s wife stopped at my booth at Winter Arts Fair, with her husband in tow, to “hint” in the most direct and obvious way possible, that she would very much like to receive one of my lanterns as a Christmas gift. Later, dutifully, then Deputy, Mike Downey returned to my booth, unaccompanied, and began perusing my selection. He looked them over, blankly, checking all of the price tags, then he shrugged, and pointed to the cheapest, and ugliest lantern in my entire collection.
I knew then, that Mike Downey was one of the dumbest men on Earth. If he had any taste at all, he would have picked out a nicer lantern, and recognized that it was worth five or ten dollars more. If he had any sense: First, his wife wouldn’t have had to “hint” at what she wanted for Christmas quite so obviously. Second, even if he had no clue why his wife liked my lanterns, he could have asked us. We knew which one his wife liked, because we pay attention, something Mike Downey apparently, cannot afford. Finally, think about how much that decision cost him:
Mike Downey disappointed his wife at Christmas. For ten dollars more, he could have gotten her exactly what she wanted. She would have been thrilled. She would have known that he loves her. She would have seen that he pays attention, and that he cares, and she would have known that she married the right guy. Instead, he saved ten bucks.
That’s how stupid Mike Downey is! Do you think he’s any better of a manager than he is a husband? No! Mike Downey is a goon who gets paid to protect the vampires, and he does what he’s told, but Measure Z will allow Mike Downey to suck blood directly from the poor people of Humboldt County, just like those HumCPR vampires he serves. That’s what’s so scary about Measure Z Vote NO on Measure Z.
I just googled “Measure Z Humboldt County,” and discovered that this blog ranks higher than any other site that opposes Measure Z. Right behind the official Support Measure Z site, the county’s Measure Z page, and a LOCO story about Measure Z, my piece, No Wifi in SoHum Means No on Measure Z ranked fourth, and was the only “No on Z” site to turn up on the entire first page of results.
Fuck! Somebody needs to stand up to Rob Arkley and Lee Ulansey’s plan to screw the poor and working people of Humboldt County. It looks like everyone else is busy with the Eureka Fair Wage Act and the County-wide GMO Ban. Personally, I don’t even garden, let alone farm, and I don’t live in Eureka, so those issues don’t effect me much.
On the other hand, Measure Z, if it passes will hurt me, and a lot of other people in Humboldt County like me, who barely make ends meet, and have neither the time nor the resources to launch a political campaign. I don’t have money for campaign literature. I don’t even have a phone to call other people to help organize a fundraiser. I have a blog. That’s it. That’s what makes Measure Z so unfair. It specifically targets the people who have the least resources to fight it. It’s like taking candy from a baby.
I make my living as an artist. The key to survival as an artist is not talent or hard work, because God knows I lack the former, and avoid the latter like Ebola. The key to survival as an artist is finding creative ways to spend even less money than you make. There is no minimum wage for artists, nor do we get any raises, cost-of-living increases or bonuses. Keeping costs down is critical to my survival, and Measure Z, if it passes will raise my cost of living, and it will definitely hurt.
If Measure Z passes, I will have to pay more for things like shoes, clothes, shampoo and toilet paper, basic necessities of life that everyone needs and has to buy. Everyone who buys anything in Humboldt County will have to pay this tax to county government. Measure Z will raise the price of everything from tampons, condoms and diapers to beer wine and cigarettes for everyone who shops in Humboldt County, but it won’t effect everyone equally.
People who have plenty of money will just shrug it off without a second thought. Land-owners think it beats paying property tax, so they won’t complain. Merchants think they are going to get something for it, namely more sheriff’s deputies tasked with the job of removing unsightly poverty from our business districts, so you don’t hear them complaining. For work-a-day stiffs, low-income families, disabled people and retirees on a fixed income, Measure Z could easily become the straw that breaks the camel’s bank.
The injustice of a county sales tax is that the primary purpose of county government is to protect the property rights of property owners. If you own property, then county government works for you, but if you don’t own property, but instead rent your home, county government are the people who evict you. That’s why, until now, your landlord paid for county government. That’s why a county-wide sales tax is unfair. Everyone pays it, but it primarily benefits land-owners, and hurts renters.
The landlords in Humboldt County have gotten so greedy that they want to make poor and working people pay for their own eviction every time they buy shoes. Listen closely to the way land-owners talk about “transients, ” because when land-owners say “transients” they mean everyone who doesn’t own land. If you’re a renter, they’re talking about you. They’re not satisfied with the exorbitant rent they already charge you. They want more. If Measure Z passes, it will be like giving your landlord an extra nickle every time you spend $10 in Humboldt County.
Your landlord takes too much of your money already! Measure Z is a shameful attempt by rich ranchers and greedy real estate developers like Lee Ulansey and Rob Arkley to steal from the poor and working people of Humboldt County. Measure Z steals from the poor and gives to the rich. We must stop it NOW. Vote NO on Measure Z
…And don’t forget to register to vote!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Following letter appeared in this week’s Independent and Redwood Times:
The only thing that looms larger on the landscape of Humboldt County than the majestic redwoods for which we are rightly famous, is the unmitigated greed of some of it’s richest residents. Today, that greed has a stranglehold on county government, and stands poised to reach into the pockets of this county’s poor,
and working people.
Measure Z, the countywide sales tax, will make bare necessities, like clothing, shoes and toiletries, more expensive for the people who can least afford them: single mothers,
and retirees on fixed incomes.
Measure Z steals from the poor, and gives their hard-earned money to Lee Ulansey’s hand-picked Board of Supervisors, who then give it to rich ranchers and greedy developers in the form of subsidies and tax breaks.
The Board of Supervisors, and the puppet-masters who pull their strings, know that poor people are the most generous, community minded people in the county, and they intend to play us for suckers.
The county has not promised to do anything to help poor or working people. Quite the contrary, the county has promised to use the money to harass homeless people, speed up evictions, and to make room in the county jail for people accused of petty crimes.
If the county is broke, it is only because it has so consistently pandered to the desires of rich land-owners, and failed to tax them sufficiently.
If measure Z passes, the county will begin collecting sales tax from everyone who spends money in Humboldt County, including many local residents who can ill afford it.
That money will pay for subsidized infrastructure to support new McMansion developments.
It will pay for subsidized pest control for ranchers, through Wildlife Services, an expensive and outdated agency notorious for cruel, inhumane practices and for indiscriminately killing millions of wild animals every year,
and it will pay for thousands of little perks for land-owners, like subsidizing the cost of hazardous materials inspections at agricultural businesses.
Measure Z will be a windfall for Humboldt County’s richest and greediest 1%.
I urge each of you to stand together with the 99%. Tell the county to tax the rich, not the poor! Make the 1% pay their fair share. Please, vote NO on Measure Z.
Sincerely, John Hardin
Local Pig Blames Chinn for “Cockroaches”, Priest’s Murder
If you want to know about the Humboldt County social milieu, this story says it all:
Long time Southern Humboldt resident, Lee Bullock, a 44 year old man, raised in Southern Humboldt, with a home, an address, and family in the area, got arrested after someone in Redway called the Sheriff about a man seen hiding in the bushes and acting “bizarre” in the early afternoon of this past New Year’s Eve. The cops came, picked up Bullock, and deduced that he was intoxicated on drugs of some kind.
That’s a pretty typical Humboldt County thing, and it happens every day around here. Drug use is not only the foundation of our local economy, it is a cherished tradition and way of life in Humboldt County, so sometimes we get a little wild and crazy. Even at 1:30 in the afternoon, Lee Bullock was probably not the first person arrested for public intoxication in Humboldt County that day, and he certainly wasn’t the last. This was New Year’s Eve, after all.
According to the cops, Bullock became “combative” while in custody. From Bullock’s mug shot in the papers, you can easily see that someone became combative with him. None of the cops reported injuries, but Bullock was taken to the hospital upon arrival at the jail in Eureka. Again, nothing unusual there. Cops beat people up all the time in Humboldt County.
After being cleared by medical personnel, Bullock was returned to jail, in Eureka, more than 60 miles from his home west of Redway, where they held him in custody until just after midnight. At a quarter-to-one in the morning, just in time for last call on New Year’s Eve, Sheriff’s deputies released Lee Bullock, on his own recognizance, into Downtown Eureka, the most densely populated city in Humboldt County.
Even though Lee Bullock has lived in Humboldt County for a long time, and has family in the area, no one came to the jail to pick him up. Either he did not call anyone, or the people he called were indisposed, declined the invitation, or failed to show up.
Look, it’s a long drive from Southern Humboldt to Eureka, and it was New Year’s Eve for God’s sake. Even if he had reached someone who cared enough to make the trip, what are the chances they were sober enough to drive?
So, Lee Bullock, no doubt crashing hard from his recent drug binge, found himself wandering aimlessly around Eureka’s residential neighborhoods on a cold night, without adequate clothing, and no way to get home. A little while later, a Eureka PD cop encountered him hanging around St. Bernard’s Catholic Church, and told him to go away.
The next morning, Eureka parishioners found their priest, Father Eric Freed, bludgeoned to death in the rectory of St. Bernard’s Church, and in Southern Humboldt, Father Freed’s car was found parked in the woods near the Bullock family home west of Redway. The cops put two and two together, and called the Bullocks to inquire about Lee’s whereabouts. Rather than have the Sheriff come all the way out to the Bullock family home, Lee’s family agreed to deliver Lee Bullock to the police for questioning.
Why would a Southern Humboldt family be so eager to drive Lee to the cops to face arrest for murder, especially when they couldn’t be bothered to pick him up from jail just the night before? I assume that was because the Bullock family home, like virtually every home in Southern Humboldt, was full of illegal drugs, guns and cash, and they didn’t want cops nosing around. That’s just a guess.
So, Lee Bullock’s step-father got in the truck and took Lee for a ride, without telling his step-son that he was delivering Lee to the authorities to face murder charges. What did Lee’s step-father say to Lee to get him in the truck? “Come on Lee, beer run!” Whatever line he used, apparently it worked.
If Lee’s step-father would have gotten in the truck the night before, he could have saved everyone involved, especially Father Freed, a lot of headaches. As it turned out, they didn’t get far down the road before Sheriff’s deputies pulled them over and arrested Lee Bullock for the murder of Father Eric Freed.
Motive: a ride home.
Now that’s a Humboldt County story, but that’s not the Humboldt County story.
The real icing, and it doesn’t get much icier, on this Humboldt County cake comes to us from the icy heart of Eureka bankster, bloodsucker, and all around swine, Rob Arkley Jr.
In a letter to the Lost Coast Outpost, Mr. Arkley expressed his feelings about this awful tragedy by blaming the murder Father Freed on Eureka philanthropist Betty Chinn.
Betty Chinn works to help poor and homeless people in Eureka, and the need is great. The recent Point-In-Time survey of homeless people, found more than 1,500 people living outside in Humboldt County in the dead of Winter. Betty Chinn does her best to help some, by no means all, of them get a meal, a shower, and maybe a place to sleep at night.
She can’t possibly help all of them, but Ms. Chinn has helped a lot of people who have fallen on hard times, put their lives back together.
Naturally, you can see why this caused a deranged SoHum druggie to murder a Eureka priest.
That’s how Rob Arkley Jr sees it, anyway. In that letter to the Lost Coast Outpost, Arkley erroneously blames Father Freed’s murder on nameless “transients” who he describes as “cockroaches”, and he blames Betty Chinn because, he claims, the services she provides to the poor, attracts more of them to Eureka.
Of course this is ludicrous, but Rob Arkley Jr is the richest man in Humboldt County, so people get paid to listen to him, and local politicians kiss his behind. Arkley hates poor people, even though, as a banker and real-estate tycoon, making people poor is what he does for a living. Arkley hates seeing poor people around town. He views them as vermin. He’d put poison out for them if he could.
Instead, he does the next best thing. Rob Arkley Jr has undertaken a one man, albeit one rich man, campaign to starve poverty out of Eureka. He wants to cut the already meager, county expenditures on social services to the poor, and goes the extra mile by smearing the good name of anyone who dares help the poor privately. That’s the kind of guy he is.
Imagine what it would be like if Rob Arkley Jr were different. Imagine what Rob Arkley Jr the millionaire owner of Security National Bank and Humboldt County real-estate tycoon, might say about the murder of Father Eric Freed, if Arkley were an honest man. I think it would sound something like this:
“You want to know why that priest, what’s his name, got killed? That priest got killed because the underground marijuana industry that drives the economic engine of Humboldt County, not to mention my own personal fortune, relies very heavily on black-market drug dealers.
Wherever you have lots of black-market drug dealers, you are bound to have lots of black-market drugs. Whenever you have lots of black-market drugs, you can expect an abundance of drug-crazed freaks like Lee Bullock.
Now that this underground economy is a couple of generations old, we’re breeding drug-crazed freaks, like Lee Bullock, in the hills all over Humboldt County. These drug-crazed freaks don’t care about anything but themselves and their drugs, and they’ll kill anything that gets in their way. I know that because I have a lot in common with those freaks, except that I don’t care about anything but myself and my money.
Now, whenever any of those drug-crazed freaks act-up, anywhere in Humboldt County, the Sheriff hauls them to jail, holds them for a few hours, then quietly turns them loose, in the dead of night, into the quiet residential neighborhoods of Eureka. That’s why father what’s his name got killed.”
“Oh, and by the way,” an honest Arkley might add, “That’s also why we have so many homeless people in Humboldt County. Since most of the residential housing in Humboldt County has been converted into, much more lucrative, commercial marijuana farms,
…the remaining, non-drug-dealing populace, has been put out in the cold,
…and I’m damn sick and tired of seeing them there. I think we should put out poison.”
Unfortunately, Rob Arkley Jr is not an honest man, and he did not say that.
Nonetheless, that is the truth about Humboldt County.